Thursday, November 18, 2004

 

Alexander The FABULOUS!

Oliver Stone, who is still unsure that even he didn't blow JFk's brains out and worships the air that murderer Fidel farts into, has made a movie about Alexander the Great. Big surprise, it's completely insane. I heard halfway through the movie there's a big car chase and at the end, UFO's take Alexander away to Neptune, where he rules to this day.

I guess everyone expected that. But Stone could have at least picked someone better to play the lead than Colin fucking Farrell (no relation to fellow talent-deficiter Will Ferrell). I mean Alexander Magnus rode a horse. He didn't shoot horse. What's got people even more abuzz is Alexander's bisexuality. I guess most educated people know Greeks liked the fanny-lancing back then (and still do; why do you think they call it Greek fucking?) but I don't think enyone, except Frank Rich, wants to see two guys in full-on lip lock.

I get the feeling that's not the first guy Colin has tongued.

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